Some people have cute smiles. Some people have cute personalities. Some people have cute bodies. You can see where I’m going with this.
I have way too many cute attributes. Especially as society expects a grown man of color to be portrayed as.
Now before you think I’m sucking my own dick let me explain I am no way in any form bragging on my cuteness. Honestly the shits not all it’s cracked up to be after age 5.
Just to emphasize; I went through an ugly duckling phase. Weirdly enough I was an adorable little girl then matured into this awkward prepubescent and then evolved in to this adolescent social butterfly.
Between the ages of 5 – 9 I was adorable my dimple would always get my way and my thick eyebrows and hyperjetic facial expressions got me out of almost anything.
As a child I always heard “you are so cute ” “oh wow she is so adorable” I’d give a little fake smile yada yada.
Fast forwarding here cause we are getting off track ; Now at almost 26 years old this “cute thing” does more harm then good in soooo many different ways. Yes of course I’m going to explain.
It’s is so hard to look my age. A simply task, taken for granted; that so many of you do naturally. It’s the 8th wonder of the world for me. I struggle from what style clothes I should wear. The way I wear my hair. Even the way I walk into a business or establishment. It’s a bother it is. And it’s rooted in the basic fact that I have a cute face. When you hear cute facial features your brain doesn’t necessarily think “man” now does it. So put a cute face on a individual the size of a teenager most likely in a Pokémon Tee plus the amount of facial hair (mainly peach fuzz) of a prepubescent male. You see a sweet innocent cute young man. In some instances I’ve gotten as young as 14 (Caucasian) an in the rare occasion besides when someone guesses my correct age I’ve only gotten as old as 24 on a good day. You know nice suit fresh shave pep in his step kinda days.
Damn this cute face.
Mistaken identity; believe it or not me being so often perceived as a cute little young boy I get mistaken as such like for real. I’ve gotten stopped for being “truant” at 11:30 on a school day. Getting carded while my young barely legal associates walk right on through. And yes even embarrassingly enough mistook for a son when I was a boyfriend. Issa boyfriend. More recently being hit on by girls that are barely half my age. That’s appalling and disturbing to say the least. Not to mention that 16 year olds are staring to look at attempt to act like grown women. But this hasn’t just happen. This has been going on for quite some time in my liddo ol life. Interesting story about my first age ain’t nothing but a number till ha ppl find out scare. But will save that for another day. Point is when you look young you like shift into a whole other age bracket. And that sucks when it’s like been there done that.
Not being taken seriously. One person has a pit bull as a watch dog , another person has a chihuahua as a watch dog. Which person to you think is getting robbed more ? Maybe an extreme analogy but stay with me. Because this cute attribute makes every day like stressful to some extent. Especially when a person like me is already wary of relationships with other humans. Nice guys finish last but cute guys never finished. When you suffer from a cute personality people often see you as docile calm and in no way a threat. And it’s not like a brightly color “oh that’s cute but that shit can fuck me up cause it’s probably poisonous”. Its like that kid that stalks a harmless butterfly because it’s “cute” and then squashes it because it’s in now way shape or form dangerous.
With that being said take into consideration that I am that cute little butterfly every day of my life.
So I ask you is being cute all that it’s cracked up to be
Peace & blessings Guys , Gals and Everyone in between.
I made a sad attempt at getting 2 blogs out in a week. I swear I don’t have that much to write about. New York springs are basically winter to me , so I stay indoors and cabin fever turns into writer’s block.
This a small therapy update.
5 days ago I switched to the gel. After missing a weekly injection for 3 time and honestly not really being upset about it, I decided to just switch to the gel. Luckily for me it was covered by my insurance and I’m still paying barely nothing.
Since I switched to gel & I have zero anxiety about “shot day”. 😂
I’m on a different type of gel then I had been on previously. But it’s basically the same. Instead of jar and a measuring spoons it’s 30 convenient individual tubes. It’s 5 grams per day instead of the 1 gram I was familiar with. It’s specific location is the chest , shoulders & upper arms; but we all know I don’t follow rules.
All in all the only negative thing I have to say about it is it’s a little more sticky then I expected and would like. But about 10-15mins after application it’s completely dry and no longer has the feeling of slight stickiness. I would compare it to the feeling of confusing the handsanitizer with the soap.
My last T levels were around 600 and I believe that a month of shots so probably have my levels checked again a month and some change on the gel.
Spoiler alert I’ve been on the gel less than a week and I already missed a day , typical Kris.
Smell ya later
Facebook: Iman King
Sometimes you meet angels. They look like regular people. But something is different; their energy, their vibe. You can feel it. It warms your heart. Gives you a feeling of joy, hope; that the world maybe isnt that bad of a place. I love meeting angels. Especially since the world is lately in such a dark space, filled with so much evil & animosity. I have only been luck enough to meet about 4 angels that I know of. But each was a blessing in its own way. Even if it was only momentarily. As the years pass I see less & less people (myself included) excited or even in a good mood during the holidays. Yes, times are different. Yes, the world has gotten darker. Yes, the holidays are now more commercialized then ever. BUT take it for what its worth. Make the best of it & at the very least be grateful, thankful and joyful that you have lived through this year because sooo many others cannot say the same.
Taking a small writers hiatus for the holidays… So ill catch everyone up in January.
Merry/Happy whatever you celebrate!!!
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FB: Kristian King
Also adding* ask.fm/inspiredtad for anonymous questions.
DAMNNNN testosterone back at it again with the bullshit!
Soo I refuse to believe that its the air that brought on this sore throat, yup I’m blaming it on our good friend testosterone. But in all seriousness its been a week since starting therapy & I have in the last 2 days have been suffering from a sore itchy throat. I can only describe it as feeling like I swallowed a thick peice of bread and its stuck behind my adam’s apple. Ugh.
Besides that I have had a temper flare up once that I ashamed of to say the least. In general I do find myself raising my voice more than usual & not (at the current moment) caring who I offend or hurt. This is completely different than how I am normally. This time I am being proactive about & being honest with myself knowing that I may have a (slight) problem controlling my temper.
Also my mood in general is VERY sporadic going from mania to depression and back again at random almost blink of the eye speed. Not fully blaming therapy for that because I was diagnosed as bipolar at a very young age, however I will point out that I dont believe the testosterone is helping; blah.
At least 3 of the last 7 days I found myself either taking off the top blanket in the middle of the or pulling off the covers completely. Ew I hate night sweats.
This morning during my morning leak I notice that my penis looked slightly different. Not bigger… Just different, fuller, maybe. Speaking of which, at least one day in the last week I have had an erection nearly all day; starting with morning wood and just never going away. Actually lately my penis has been extra sensitive & its cause some discomfort.
A few whiskers have been sprouting on my jawline but I dont think they are new per say just maybe a little more prominate & darker than before but that could be from finally shaving for the first time since the end of October not completely sure. Lately (within the last 5 months or so) I had experienced a constant spread of peach fuzz from my side burns across my cheeks and along my jawline, so I cant chalk that up to therapy either. Guess we’ll have to play the waiting game to get a clear guess at the cause of this whole “woolly mammoth” thing that I have going on.
Other than that I havent notice any significant changes, but then again I havent really been looking for any either.
7 days & 2 shots in is too soon to tell…
Thanks for dropping by & I hope everyone appreciates the increase in the amounts of blogs.
Till next time, peace & blessings
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Just a little more than 48hrs into therapy and it feels like I’m already coming down with an oh so familiar throat cold. But with these artic new york temperatures it might be an actually cold, eh. Besides that I’ve felt an increase in energy (in a playful childish way) and this morning I woke up with “morning wood”. Still some tenderness near the shot site but that of course was expected since its been over a year for my last injection. Its not overly sore, painful or bothersome, and it actually could be a mind thing.
Had a random thought that this all could be a “mind thing” , like what if i was injected with a mere placebo; regardless of what the dr, script or actually vile said… Who really knows?..
My Dr didnt check my levels unfortunately before my first injection, which I was hoping for, I’ve been curious as to why since the winter started I’ve have this “woolly mammoth” thing going on with my face. But oh well, I’m assuming that she will draw blood and check my levels during my appointment next week.
So to the deets of everything and the jist of me returning to therapy. All of my blood work came back good minus the fact that my bad cholesterol is high and my good cholesterol is low. No big deal. My Dr just advised me to eat less greasy foods & do more cardio, blah.
I am currently on a weekly injection of .25. Seems kinda high for me, but the Dr is the one with the degree so for the time being im just gonna flow with it. If I’m not mistaken last time I was doing injections for therapy it was a biweekly dose of .25. Lets see how this goes..
On the mental side of things I’m slightly worried that going through therapy this time with this amount of testosterone will either bring on physical changes I’m not really keen on happening(anyways) too fast. Also on the backside of that even slightly less worried that it could cause extra testosterone in my body to turn into estrogen (rare cases but it happens). Overall however I have complete faith in my Dr and her knowledge & abilities, so yeah I’m gonna chill; kick my feet up and see what happens.
So now onto the changes…
Come on guys, its only been 2 days, ha ha.
But seriously even though I’m neither stupidly excited nor dreadfully fearfull I’ll make sure to keep my readers posted & try to keep up with all (if any) changes.
I appreciate all my readers; whether you drop by once in a while to catch up or if you’re subcribe to stay up to date in real time (*which by the way I sometimes blog days in advances before I actually post) with all my blogs. I know I dont many (if any) of you personally but it does mean quite alot to me knowing that some one some where is intrigued with me or my story enough to stop by and read my words. Yall are the real MVPs. 😃
Again like always, thanks for stopping by..
PS: If you have been looking for my vlogs on youtube, I havent forgot, I’m just waiting for my very special editor to free up some time cause I suck at editing (and recording). But hopefully I will have something up no later than the new year. Its the holidays; bear with me people…
Till next time ✌..
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FB: Kristian King
Welp, today is finally here. I have a doctor appointment this afternoon to start horomone replacement therapy. A few weeks ago a had blood drawn for my labs. The regular check my levels, liver, blood count etc. So if everything comes back accordingly today I should be getting my script for testosterone.
Mentally speaking I am somewhat anxious just for the fact that therapy will bring on several changes mentally and physically. Glad I already know what to expect as far as body fat redistribution, mood swings, body masculinization, growth, body hair increase, body temperature and odor changes etc. But going into therapy this time knowing Im in it for the long haul has me uneasy.
If you have been following my blogs for quite sometime then you know that staying in therapy long term has been somewhat challenging. Usually discontinuing therapy was a result of either a lack of funds or a lack of desire, mostly the latter. Im not sure if I said this before but I’m not completely content with taking a bi weekly shot of testosterone or a daily dose of topical testosterone for the rest of my life. Not having a deep voice or a full beard would not make me dysphoric. I stand firm with my beliefs that it takes wayyyy more than that to be a man. So with that being said Im still not completely sold with taking testosterone for the rest of my life, however I will consider it & also set goals and a timeline to decide when/if I will discontinue therapy. I do no want to nor do I plan on being in therapy my entire life.
If you know me personally then you know I switch my mind like night and day & nothing personally is set it stone. So I guess if you really want to know how everything turns out you’ll have to follow my blogs/vlogs to stay up to date.
Thanks for sticking around this long
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In honor of no shave november, today I will be ironic and blog about my facial routine.
Personally I feel like shaving CAN help facial hair grow. I’m not saying it does & I’m not saying it doesnt. However I DONT think it has any negative side effects.
For me, personally; shaving ALONG with my facial hygiene routine did help my facial hair grow.
If you know me then you know I have had problems in the past with schedule keeping so technically the routine I am about to explain is more of an outline than a exact dialogue. Ha ha. Bare with me.
1.) Wash your face
2.) Rinse your face
3.) Moisturize your face
**Not kidding folks all of those steps are important. Don’t skip any!
Going through my first puberty (more of a small growth hiccup) I was lucky enough to not have acne problems. Unfortunately I also had “not so great” facial hygiene. Since my face didnt require that extra attention as a result of acne.. I didnt pay it any attention at all.
Fast fowarding to a few years ago when I began my transistion & went through my 2 puberty. I would exactly call it acne, but my face definitely went through something. I’m assuming it was because of new peach fuzz poppin through un-used hair follicles, sweating more profusely & small changes in everyday activities.
So now I have to like wash my face everyday… Ugh
(just kidding, kinda)
After growing tired of popping pimples on my jawline & putting toothpaste on my cheeks; I started taking exquisite care of my face.
Washing your face in the shower every day is a duh, right? Yeah, but somehow I still managed to jack that up.
So my routine now is to have a separate towel for my face with a 3 day max use. I only wash my face with gold dial antibiotic bar soap or the white dove sensitive skin bar soap. I save the smell good soap for my body.
Next is a step that I used to half-a** all the time.
I rinse my face until its squeaky clean, literally. And usually once more after. No matter how “skin friendly” a soap says it is, not properly rinsing can clog your pores and cause a pimple outbreak.
Also,(here’s the part where its mostly an outline) I wash my face once when I get out of bed and once before laying down for bed. Not sure about the statistics or fun facts behind this, It just makes my face feel cleaner.
Do NOT OVER moisturize your face! That puts you back at square one, with an oily dirty face covered in gunk thats just not supposed to be there. Drying your face out can also be a con. But personally I rather be a little ashy than greasy.
Im not going to tell you what I use, (no one pays me for advertising, yet) but just listen to your body and try not to constantly over or under do it.
And that is how I finally learned how to properly wash my face at age 22.
Again, I am not a scientist nor do I have scientic proof for the following statement. This is my personal opinions and results.
When I started to feel blue about being “beardless”, I took it upon myself to be proactive and started to try and grow a legit beard.
Now when I say proactively grow a beard a mean I adopted the habit as if I had patchy stubble, instead of just sporadic peach fuzz.
I started shaving my (imaginary) beard every 2 to 4 days. Sometimes clean, but mostly trying different styles. Always using a sharp razor, shaving cream & after shave. Even faithfully brushing my beard & carrying my brush almost 100% of the time.
Occasionally doing smaller things I read online; like daily 10-15min facial massages, eating foods that promotes healthy skin and hair & home made mixture that stimulate hair follicles.
It took a while, but eventually I started seeing more facial hair. At first it was barely noticable. The longer and more strict I was with my invented routine the more changes I saw.
In the recent months I started seeing my imaginary beard come to life. Just barely, but its nice to have peach fuzz everywhere you want with connections. Gives me hope for when I shed my down feathers and grow into my big boy beard. Ha ha.
“Patience is key. Finding what individually works for you is the lock. And your beard is the door, open it up.”
NO SHAVE, NOVEMBER
No shave november is more than letting your beard grow, boycotting the barber & letting your inner hippy breathe. November is cancer awarenes month. (as well as transgender, diabetes & men’s health awareness month)
During November if you choose to participate in #NSN let your hair grow wild, free & unkept. This is done for a few different reasons.
To show support and solidarity to all those who have lost the ability to grow hair due to chemotherapy while battling any type of cancer & those that have passed because of it.
To raise awareness about all different types of cancer. If you are normally known to be clean and neat; you will arouse questions when you change to a more of a wild and free look. “Why?” Conversation starter!
To donate all of the money that you would normally spend on hair care products such as hair cuts and styles, razors and shaving accessories, relaxers, perm etc to a cancer charity.
No shave november is mostly known in the male community and is expected to bring thick wild facial hair from stubble to paul bunyan beards. But everyone can participate in #nsn , men, women & everything in between. You dont have to skip a hair cut & you don’t have to have to grow an overnight drake beard. No shave november = cancer awarness. As long as you spreading awarness you are paticipate.
And that my friends.. is the real story behind the misunderstood & misinterpreted #NoShaveNovember
Thanks for stopping by and see you next time 🌎✌
Peace & blessings
Yt: Kristian King
Ok maybe I’m overreacting. But just a tad.
Peace and blessings everybody. Welcome back to my readers, you’ve been here from quite sometime if you have been here from the start. Thank you.
And to my new readers welcome just the same and thank you for reading my blog.
I suppose today would be some what of a personal update from my last blog talking about hygiene.
I believe I’m some where in between 3 and 4 weeks into therapy. Man has the last week been a brutal heat wave.
I’ve seem to have had a major increase in body temperature lately. I know the heat outside has risen lately due to the fact that its a typical hot new orleans summer. I work in air condition, the normal temp in my house could most likely accommodate an artic penguin but i still seem to have these “hot flashes” early in the morning & now I sweat in my sleep.
Im not sure if its due to the therapy or maybe I’m getting sick. Ill make sure to bring that up to my dr at my next appointment this week.
Its not that much of a nuisance, but with it already being an average 90° a day weather it is quite annoying when I’m the only one burning up indoors.
To combat the unusual hot body temps I’ve changed to wearing only a tank when I’m out but not at work and usually going shirtless when I’m home. However I know that may not be possible for guys with bigger pecs. Or for the guys that layer or bind on a regular basis.
I suggest if going tank only or shirtless wont work for you try breathable clothing and bright colors.
I say this often but powder is really a guy’s best friend!
Fb: Kristian King
YouTube: Mr Iman King
Welcome back peeps today I’m going to talk about hygiene. Woah, seriously?
Yes seriously; as a transmale going through puberty(again for some) can be a tough & confusing time. Weird smells, odd hair, sweaty oily skin all this shit can get happen crazy fast. Especially if you’re going through therapy.
Lucky for me I already had a natural musk that over the years I learned what worked for me. And I was hairy as a pubescent tween, runs in the family. But even I wasnt prepared for the chest and back hair. The increased natural body temperature. And basically “hulked-out” all my favorite t shirts.
I also picked up a few tips along the way and maybe they will work for you.
As you transition depending on your genetics and therapy you will experience increase hair growth on varies areas of your body. Since this is a hygienic blog I’m not going to dig deep into stuff like leg, arm, back hair etc.
Starting with arm pit hair. First and most important rule. If you can smell your self so can others! If you haven’t already switched deodorants you probably should. Men deo like axe, old spice, and riteguard are made for men. For the extra sweating and more odor we sometimes produce then our female counter parts.
Hopefully this doesn’t trigger anyone..
Pubic hair… Some dudes, actually alot of men manscape. But if you dont there’s nothing wrong with a trim now and again. If you’re one of those fellas that prefer the buckwheat style; powder can be your bestfriend (especially if you pack) and I would suggest to stay away from tight fitting briefs & speedos. Let your bush breath. Ha ha. Nobody likes the smell of sweaty ball sack 😝.
Some men are still trapped in the past. There is nothing wrong with a man who takes care of his feet. It does not make him any less masculine. Smelly feet do not make you a man. They make you a caveman. 😂
If you have extra sweaty or “wet” toes it helps to dry in between each toe individual, dust them with a little foot powder and make sure to give them a minute when you get out the shower to really “dry” out.
Face and acne.
Personally I wasnt assaulted with acne the first time I went thru puberty. The second time was slightly different but I was able to fight it off with proactive preventative tricks of the trade.
Rinsing off cold water after a bath or shower, closes pores & also tightens skin.
Washing my face every morning with an only face towel and throughly rinsing. Apply aftershave after each shave. Most importantly keeping my hands and fingers out of my face.
In conclusion there is nothing wrong with a man with excellent hygiene. Which can prove difficult while going through puberty but if you listen to your body and try a few trials and errors you could easily become the best smelling guy on the block. 😃
If you have any questions about penis hygiene especially after growth feel free to email me.
As always, feel free to follow me on social media.
Fb: Kristian King
YouTube: Mr Iman King
I look at transitioning different then alot of guys. Same goes for HRT. I look at it as the whole picture and think with the end in mind. The biggest difference I found & where alot of guys go wrong is comparing and contrasting transitions and results of therapy.
Not that I havent been on the short end of the stick for a while; quite a while if you know me personally. But if its one thing I learned society expects from men it is to be strong. No matter how many times you get knocked down get up and the key part: Fight back!
After going thru my first full dedicated week back in therapy in Jah knows how long; I’ve come to realize that I was anxious for no reason. (Which of course I already knew that, but just going thru the motions I suppose.
I’m not here to discuss physical changes thats going to pretty much happen to some extent regardless. I’m swinging by to discuss the mental and emotional changes. That can also be achieved way before therapy.
Before I get into that let me explain why I refer to taking horomones or testosterone as therapy. Besides the fact that’s basically what it is.
When you are prescribed horomones by your doctor they are for the Horomone Replacement Therapy you are going through to medical transition from one gender to another.
Yea real shit, I know.
It is therapy. Like someone would take therapy say for a messed up back or leg. Or even therapy for a speech or physiological problem. Therapy is exactly what it is. If you dont put forth the effort AND have the patience you will not be very successful in your goals you wish to achieve by going through the therapy in the first place.
Personally when I first started therapy a few years back I was not really serious about it. Not to confuse it with not being serious about my transition. I was just not “amused” with the whole idea of going through a medical replacement therapy. That indecisiveness led to therapy being put on the back burner. Missing doctor’s appointments, missing shots etc, and eventually led to me discontinuing therapy all together.
Even though I decieded to not continue with HRT that did not slow down or stop my process of transitioning.
Instead of focusing on achieving goals like facial hair, deep voice, masculine chest, gender reassignment surgeries etc (things that transmen keep telling society does not make you a man *kayne west shrug*) I focused on other, to me, more important qualities in being a man. A king to his castle.
All those little things set the foundation to the man I am building.
Doesnt matter how full my beard is or how deep my voice is if people are using incorrect pronouns and birth names.
I wont be seen as a real man just because my chest is flat or I’m bigger than most guys in the gym locker room if I’m not taking care of home and my family.
Kind of get where I’m going with this now?..
I couldnt respect myself as a man, made from dirt; no control of this emotions & actions, with no foundation and no principles and values of a real man and I wouldnt ask anyone else to.
Anyways, back to my first week back in therapy. Lets just say its way better the second time around, now that I know what I’m getting into.
Mentally I have already transitioned so honestly this therapy thing should be a breeze.
Thanks for dropping by again.
As always, feel free to follow me on social media.
Fb: Kristian King
YouTube: Mr Iman King